Kindness, Compassion and Love: A Quiet Yet Potent Personal Revolution

I know you would never think of kindness and compassion and self-love, as something to be a revolutionary act. Yet a few months ago while 2016 was slowly coming to a close, I posted on Facebook this little blip on my approach to activism:

My activism is a quiet yet potent one. I treat all people with respect and consideration. I’m open to another person’s point of view even when they differ from mine.

For I do not have all the answers. I am willing to do my best to want to understand someone, than to judge and condemn. I’m not perfect in this. Yet I know I do the best I can and fortunately that this is what I am able to do most of the time.

Well this little blip on Facebook got a conversation going between myself and Melissa Welsh:

She shared how being kind is a huge deal. That also kindness shouldn’t be a big deal, yet sadly in the world today during these times it is a very big deal.

She sadly had a very good point as to why kindness seems a rare thing in the world today. We are encouraged on so many fronts to be afraid of this and of that, of this group of people and that group. We are encouraged to judge and condemn one another. We are told how to be, what to do, what to say, what to wear and so much more, so we can be acceptable, to be loved. Then we are faced with the fact most of us feel that others can’t relate or understand us, our lives , our challenges.

In fact most of us feel like we are the only ones facing challenges. Too many of us also feel like life hates us, life is too hard, that life is out to get us and that all that people know how to do is use us.  We live in constant stress and overload. So it isn’t a surprise that most people are in what I’ve come to understand as Survival Mode.

In this mode, that way too many of us live, kindness and human decency can go out the door. We often operate from a very enclosed space that is filled with our stress and worries, it is the only thing we see most days and we lose touch with one another and even ourselves. We lose touch with the rest of life. The part of life that is beautiful, friendly, amazing and surprising. The part of life that makes us smile and laugh and get a glimpse of joy.

As this conversation moved along and another in person conversation in December that I had with  Kenya Coviak  it got to the important part of what this article is about:

Kindness, Compassion & Love starts with us, with each individual, with each person that looks in a mirror!

The three of us, in these different conversations got to the core of why kindness is a big deal. Most of us struggle with loving and accepting ourselves. We struggle with being gentle, kind and understanding with ourselves.

We keep being stuck on the hamster wheel of thinking love, kindness and compassion comes from outside ourselves.

That if only we have this or that, wear this or that and so forth and all of this just so we can be loved, accepted and feel good about ourselves. It’s an even tougher thing for those of us that in one way or another ended up being different.We have mental and emotional things that make us different. Our skin color, our body shape, hair, eyes that makes us different. We have temperaments, personalities and intelligences that make us different. We hold different beliefs and opinions of our families, religions and so many other ways that make us different. Sadly we are not encouraged to celebrate and honor these differences.

So how do we get to that place of being able to love and be kind and compassionate toward ourselves?

There are many ways to getting to that place of love. So let me guide you through some of this. First order of business:

Look in a mirror at least 3 times a day, then as loudly or as quietly for you may have folks in the house or place of work, yet say: I love You!

I know that may seem too simplistic and silly too, yet I tell you it starts the process, it gets the ball rolling. I start you to with a mirror because that sort of puts you outside of you. Let’s face it we can say we love our kids our, partner, friends and many others. Yet we struggle with saying that and feeling that for ourselves. So a mirror is a good place to start. And because there is great power in words and voice it is important that you speak the words I love you!. So yes shout those three words or whisper those three words at least 3 times a day.

Then I have another step I share with you, it is something I do for myself I sing this, chant it or just speak it at least 2 times in a day. Here it is:

I love myself!

I love my life!

All the way through

the deepest depths

the highest heights.

All the way around

and all within

I love myself!

I love my life!

Another thing I chant, sing or speak and I suggest you do this one also 2 times a day is this one:

Oh dear love!

With these eyes let me see

the love that is shining down.

With these feet let me feel:

the love that is rising up.

With these ears let me hear

the love that is all around.

And with this heart and mind

know the love that is within,

everything, everyone and everywhere!

This is just your start! I start you out this way for you start to love yourself, your life and realize that love is there within you and is all around! This gives you a good foundation and also the energies needed to start the next part. Which is deprogramming yourself, disconnecting yourself from all that stuff that tells you, that you are not lovable or that you can’t love yourself or that you can’t know love till this or that happens or this or that you have to have in order to love yourself and your life.

I want to share with you a teacher that writes some wonderful books on how to free ourselves from our programming and how to live a life in which we love ourselves and our lives and can live it with joy. The first book I read of this teacher’s works was suggested to me during a growth and healing spurt that being challenging. I was at ConVocation during that time and some things were being stirred up when somebody recommended Miguel Ruiz’s book: “The Four Agreements“. I didn’t know what to expect. The book isn’t a thick one and it was the first I had heard of this person. Yet I am so glad I bought the book.  Let me share a bit of those agreements:

The Four Agreements: By Don Miguel Ruiz

1. Be Impeccable with your World:

Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the Word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your Word in the direction of truth and love.

2. Don’t Take Anything Personally

Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.

3. Don’t Make Assumptions

Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.

4. Always Do Your Best

Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgement, self-abuse and regret.

As you can see just by this introduction, that these agreements are about learning to be kind, compassionate and loving toward ourselves. These agreements help us to not use our words against ourselves or others. That it is alright to communicate yourself clearly about how you feel, what you want and to not be afraid to ask questions. These agreements teach us so much more. And Don Miguel Ruiz’s approach is gentle. It at times felt like I was sitting in front of a loving Great Grandparent that is sharing what life has taught them. I also highly recommend don Miguel Ruiz’s other books for further reading.

Other authors I recommend is Nirmala and Gina Lake. Both of these authors have much to share on how to love yourself and getting free of the programming that keeps you trapped in the loop of not loving yourself.  A couple of both of these authors are:


Nothing Personal: Seeing Beyond the Illusion of a Separate Self

Living From the Heart

Gina Lake

Getting Free: How to Move Beyond Conditioning and Be Happy

Trusting Life: Overcoming Fear and Beliefs That Blocks Peace and Happiness

There are many other authors and teachers I could share. But I know what I am sharing is a lot in this writing. But each of the mentioned authors can be great guides helping you to deprogram yourself. Will help you learn how to love yourself even when things are challenging and you make mistakes. They will give you a great foundation that will make the next recommendation a bit less challenging with time.

Unplug yourself and start limiting your media interactions.I would suggest start by limiting the amount of news and commercials you watch or listen to. I know I know, I can hear it the What! and such. And I want you to know I’m not suggesting that all media is bad or that all news sources are bad for us. But it does help to unplug ourselves some from certain parts of the media. For let’s face it, most news is all about all the hurtful ways we harm each other, or compete against each other.You are lucky if the news on TV can even share one positive event that happened, save this team or that team won, or hey tomorrow is going to be a sunny day. News on TV can really can get us spooked and stressed.

So yes unplug from the news some. Then commercials sit there and tells us what will make us cool, interesting and such. Commercials will tell us this or that can fix us.  Yes I know when you are watching a show you want to stay on top of things with that show. Yet it is a good thing to watch a lot less commercials. The other area in our lives with media is, social media.

I love social media. It lets me stay in touch with people I meet at festivals and ConVocation and also with some of my family. Yet I know that with social media comes all that sharing of information. Some of it is great and fantastic. But some of it will stress us out and put us in a place of fear. With most social media engines working on watching your likes and loves or even what you hate. They go by what we are responding to!!!So you see on a day you get on and most of what you are seeing is this and that going wrong somewhere or somehow.Don’t click on every single one of them and don’t click the emotes showing how you felt about said thing.

Limit your responses for what lifts you up or what encourages to love yourself or what might help in a difficult yet positive way to see something different about yourself or your life. I know this is a radical idea.

Yet I tell you as a highly sensitive empath  and highly functional Autistic person, cutting out some of that media does a world of good to ease some stress in our lives. Helps us not feel so overwhelmed. We start feeling less fearful. We also start being able to really get to know ourselves and what we really want, because we aren’t getting hammered as much by others telling us what’s good or not good for us through the media. So just do your best to limit some of your media time and what you take in as you look and read.

I know this has been an extensive sharing of things. Yet I know that it is a needed thing for each of us to learn to be loving, compassionate and kind people toward ourselves. We need to learn that we, us, each individual can heal and change things for the better toward ourselves and our lives.

It all starts with You and Me doing our individual best to be kind, compassionate and loving toward ourselves and our lives!!!

Be Blessed Dear Ones and Love Yourselves and One Another!!!

Aurora Shirina Lee


Decline of the Empath

A photo by Andrea Boldizsar.


An empath, no matter what name or term you use; syphon, sensitive, touchy feely, crybaby, worry wart, and the all-time worst, manic-depressive. Some people that are being diagnosed with manic-depression, or depression period, are they truly mentally ill? Or is that just the pharmaceuticals’ plot to earn more money by shoving pills down someone’s throat? Or it just society in general so determined to label a person?

What some people fail to understand is that some empaths do not just feel what others feel, some actually draw some of those emotions into their very own psyche. Some are so in tuned that they draw out other physical attributes as well.

Think about it. Do you have anyone in your life that if you have a headache, or some other minor ailment like perhaps a stomach ache, once you’re around that person it seems to get better, or maybe even go away altogether? Pay attention to that person afterwards, how are they feeling once you begin to feel better?

Many of you that read this Newsletter already know this, at the least the basics. What you may not realize is how many empaths are truly being tossed not only to the waste side, but how many are now committing suicide. More and more posts are on facebook asking, begging for help before they do something drastic and irrevocable.

Most believe that for anyone to commit suicide they’re only taking the cowards way out. But when you’re a person who not only has their own emotions to deal with, but that of everyone’s around you as well? And with all of the heartbreak, violence, and senseless deaths going on in today’s world the old saying becomes an everyday burden and it truly does feel as though the entire world is on your shoulders. Turning on the news is a huge risk because now it is almost a definite that some tragedy will have occurred. Listening to it and seeing the reactions of the ones left behind to deal with the aftermath with questions that will forever go unanswered because what happened should never have happened at all. Being an empath you not only see these things playing out you feel the emotions coming at you like a tidal wave smacking you in the face, a tsunami attempting to pull you in and take you under to the point of no return.

Some are able to put a damper on these feelings, some can easily meditate and wash at least some of these imprints away. Others are not so lucky. Others have it build and build, not even knowing nor understanding what it is they are truly going through. When they try to discuss with anyone they just blow them off, tell they need therapy, or worst, make them feel as though there is something wrong with them, that they are the problem. And when some of these people do go to seek therapy, the only thing most of these doctors want to do is push pills at them. Pills to alter their way of thinking, their way of being, that alter their very own self. No, all pills are not wrong, and some truly do need them. But I can attest to this, even when some people have a reason that excepted by society to grieve and go in to see these doctors, they want to force feed you medicine. They did this to me when I lost my son. Instead of helping me to find some sort of coping mechanism they would much rather just give me some anti-depressants. What’s the difference between that and a bottle of alcohol? At least with the alcohol there is less of a chance of becoming dependent upon it.

Some that know and understand exactly what it is that is happening to them just have no chance to meditate, no way to damper the emotions and feelings that they take in day after day after day. Sadly, these are the ones we are seeing more and more with the posts on facebook crying out that they are ready to give up on life in general. These are the ones that come to the point where they can take this heaviness no longer and indeed end their very own lives. That is exactly what it feels like, a heaviness. Emotions may not carry a physical mass for everyday people, but for an empath it does.

When these empaths have no one they can truly turn to, no one to talk to that will even try to understand, instead just ridicule and judge that heaviness begins to weigh even more. When you add on their own losses to that; losing a job, a house, a car, a relationship, that weight starts being more than they can bare. They begin to feel that not only are they carrying a weight that’s more than two times their own mass, but that they are also wading through a fog so thick they can’t even see their way to the other side.

If this sounds like you, don’t give up. A better is coming, it has to be. Hold on to that hope, make plans for when that day finally comes. And surround yourself with people that do truly understand, or at the very least try to understand. The ones trying to bring you down even lower than you already are, let them go. Trust me, I know this is so much easier said than done, but if you’re at that breaking point think about who is more important, and the answer is you.

If you know someone who this sounds like, lend them a shoulder. Even if you have no idea what they’re crying about, even if it seems stupid to you that they’re crying, it won’t hurt you to let your shirt get wet with a few tears. If they seem to be boiling over with anger for no reason at all, offer them an ear to listen and just let them vent.

Some of these suicide attempts are straight b.s., no more than cries for attention. Some are the real deal, don’t find out which one it is when it’s too late.

Understanding and Letting Go of a Temporary Guide Relationship

A tired traveler stops on the lonely desert road that he is traveling to rest for a moment. The path so far has been through a landscape seemingly barren of life save for the occasional cactus. He takes a sip of water from his canteen to clear the dust from his throat then continues to march forward. After traveling a bit more, he reached a crossroads.

There on the corner sat a woman. She had laid out a small cloth and had placed upon it fruit, bread, cheese and a flask of wine and was munching happily. As he approached her, she looked up at him, smiled and offered to share her food. Gratefully he joined her.

After the meal was over, the traveler stood up to leave. The woman asked him where he was headed and when he told her, she pointed down a different path and said it was a shortcut. She offered to walk with him for a while since she was also going that way and the two of them set off down the road together.


As they walked, she pointed out desert flowers and plants that he had not noticed before. She spoke knowledgeably of the wild life that thrived here and told him how to cut a cactus to hydrate from the juice if he ran out of water. By the time she was finished, the desert became a colorful place filled with wonders, sustenance and thriving with life.

After a while, they came to another crossroads and the woman took her leave to continue on her own path. The man was sad to see her go but would be grateful to her forever for bringing color and life back to his world.

Much like the traveler who saw his journey as barren and lifeless until a person temporarily came into his life and pointed out all of the wonders he was missing, temporary guides can come into our lives to do the same. They may come in the form of a new lover who causes you to stop hoping for the old one to return. They may come in the form a new boss who recognizes your hard work and skills and decides to help you advance in your job or a person who makes you laugh when you thought your days of laughter were over. We feel such a strong connection with them as they work with us that we can become devastated when they take their leave. This can cause us to feel abandoned and launch us into a depression that can very well unweave all the good they have done for us.

While it’s normal to want to hang onto the ones who brought us a new sense of life, it’s important to remember that they came into our lives for a short season to pull us out of our quicksand and boost us forward on the path to our soul’s evolution. If you’ve had someone come into your life and pull you from the pit of despair before moving on, thank them, wish them well and let them go. Then straighten up and move forward with confidence on the brighter path they revealed to you. Another guide will be waiting to assist you further up the road.

Psychic Empath Goddess Rhonda Harris-Choudhry has been utilizing her psychic gifts since she was a teenager. It is her Divine mission to empower people by teaching them about their innate spiritual and energetic gifts and how to use them effectively to improve their health, life and happiness. She also trains empaths, helping them to lead happier and healthier lives. Learn more at